One of my favorite books “Tuesday with Morrie” has one chapter talking about aging. In the book, 70++ years old Morrie told 30++ years old Mitch “…I embrace aging…it’s very simple. As you grow, you learn more. If you stayed at twenty-two, you’d always be as ignorant as you were at twenty-two. Aging is not just decay…the truth is, part of me is every age”. That’s why Morrie is so special. If you ask me what I fear the most, there is no doubt, it is aging.
What I am afraid of aging are not only just about physical aging, of course, I wish I will never see any wrinkles on my face and my body and I will always have good sight and hearing, but also mental aging. You must complain that your grandma cannot use skype with you; you must also be annoyed when you just about to have a party night, the neighbor old couples knocked your door and asked you be quite; you must wonder that what old people could do every day and night. Yes we could see that old people seem more stubborn and close minded, I mean generally. I am more afraid myself become like that – refuse to accept new technology, envy young generation, and lose curiosity.
You can always convince me that I won’t become one of that, but are you sure?
Monday I went to see the movie “the best exotic marigold hotel”, which talks about a bunch of aging people went to India with all different purposes and ended up happily. It is a comedy, but English humor with aging people, definitely more like a bitter sweet one. The movie tried to tell us whatever the age people are, they could have their own happy life. But the truth is how difficult it is.
Those people who don’t know me very well probably will be surprised by what I am going to say in the following. I wish I could die when I turn into 50, ideally by accident. 50 is the perfect age to enjoy everything and not become into a crazy old human being. Anyhow, dying is not scary. “Living unhappily is something else”. I don’t mean aging equal to living unhappily, however mostly. Who knows, maybe I gonna be a super happy old lady living forever ever and ever.
But I don’t want to hide my fear of aging. I really don’t like becoming old. Besides “when you are old, you have the special smell”, like forgetfulness, and it is not particularly nice:(
